Sonic Matador.

Currently, I'm working on a mixtape. I know this isn't so cool to do anymore. People seem to have moved onto creating CD's for one another and now I've even heard of people making iPod Playlists and mp3 discs for their bitches. This is wrong. The mixtape is slowly becoming a lost art form. No one seems too happy to receive them anymore since they don't, you know, play on a fucking iPod. Once again, this goes back to the mid-nineties mentality I seem enable to shake (*see: Leave Ethics to the Kids, ya'll!). The mixtape was THE way a boy could tell a girl that he liked her without ever having to actually say the words. It was the perfect subterfuge towards what would hopefully end up being a romantic relationship...if any of us ever manned up instead of hiding behind rare 7"s and the constant stories of what bands you had seen ("oh man, you should have have been in Raleigh for that Sebadoh show, man. Fucking Elliott Smith opened! Fucking ELLIOTT SMITH! Oh man, it was great. He totally rocked that show into another level, dude."). This never impressed women, unless they were as shallow as we were, which they were decidedly not. The mixtape could do things though. It was an entire conversation (one we would probably fuck up) about music without us having to deal with anxiety, nausea or the possibility that the girl might like us back. It was amazing and p.s.--I'm really fucking good at it.

Seriously, talk to my friends. I got that shit down. You wanna hear Justin Timberlake b/w New Pornographers? Done. You want GZA and Nine Inch Nails? Bitch, I got you covered like one of those really nice condoms that are never too snug and never fucking tear. Some pop punk and jazz; weed metal and paul mccartney? Fuck yeah, I can put the records on with one hand while jerking off to some filthy ass porn with the other hand and you'll think that shit was golden. No concentration needed, motherfucker.

I know it and that's why I can say it. I'm not saying that I have an awesome palate when it comes to music though. Let's get that straight. There's a lot of good music out there and I bet I only know 0.08% of it. I got indie rock locked down though and I'm starting to get pretty good with hip hop and dance music (girls who like dance music usually have fucking amazing asses and put out easily, thus my interest).

What it comes down to is that I might not make the most wide-ranging tape, but I make the best within my means. That's where the moniker "Sonic Matador" comes from, ya'll. I think of artists like John Lennon, Jon Brion, Kanye West, John Vanderslice, Arcade Fire are the kind of people who define what a Sonic Matador truly is; a person, or group of people, who jump into music head first. They invite all instruments and techniques and always come in swinging. When they get payed form a label, you know the first thing they're doing is blowing a shit ton of that money on new instruments, just trying to make everything expand more and more.

Fuck yeah. I'm definitely not one of those in that sense. But perhaps in my own small way, with a dead language I kind of am like that. Anyway, I'm in the middle of making a bomb ass edition for my girl, so I gotta run. Peace out to the big dogs up top! Sew it up! Mend it!